The green henchman in Scary Gary is one of my favorite characters on the comics page. He’s completely deadpan, which gives his punchlines an added kick. I can’t think of another character jaded enough to spit coffee in the face of a vampire (even a middle-aged, overweight vampire) while still maintaining a disinterested facial expression. But what I really like about the green henchman is how he plays against type. This horned feller is not your typical, bumbling sidekick from the days of yore. He’s a subordinate with an attitude, which I’ll take over your run-of-the-mill Igor any day.
Archive for November, 2009
The Bears are playing the Vikings today, but I don’t think anybody expects it to be a good game. Before the season started, my fellow Chicagoans assumed that newly acquired quarterback Jay Cutler would lead the Bears to the Super Bowl. There was also an assumption that 39-year-old Brett Favre would fall flat on his face as he came out of retirement to join the Vikings. Well, 10 games into the season Minnesota is a sparking 9-1 while Chicago is a miserable 4-6. And at halftime of today’s game, the Vikings lead the Bears 24-7, a lopsided score but not a surprising one.
Like the ambitious decorator in this strip, I too have an appreciation for police, rescue personnel, nurses, and doctors. While the rest of the country takes the day off for Thanksgiving, they are asked to stand ready to put out flaming turkeys or attend to stuffing-related heart attacks. But instead of courting emergency services through unnecessary risk-taking, I choose to express my gratitude to these brave souls by steering clear of National Lampoon-style excess (no rickety ladders for me). After all, if first responders have to work on a holiday, the least I can do for them is to try to make their shift as boring as possible.
Have you ever heard the story of Fru-Fru-Fru-Frufee the Moth? It centers on a shy moth who challenges her only friend to a race…and she wins! She goes on to race all the moths on the block, in the neighborhood, in the city, in the county, in the state, in the country, in the hemisphere, and in the world…and wins all those contests, too. But when it comes time to race all the moths in the universe…she loses. And man, did you ever see a moth bawl. The story takes about 10 minutes to tell and elicits some serious groans from anyone who sticks around to hear the whole thing. But I never tire of telling it, which is probably why I enjoy today’s Pearls Before Swine as much as I do.
My fiance and I hosted a lovely Thanksgiving meal today, complete with terrific company and an awe-inspiring bird that was cooked for hours in a vat of rich chicken broth. We also took advantage of some newly discovered recipes for sweet potatoes, green beans, and cauliflower. And while our cat never made it onto the table like the beaming frog in this strip, he did make himself the center of attention through sheer force of personality. After seeing humans sitting down to eat a meal, he stalked the circumference of the table to let us know he wanted some for himself. It didn’t take long for us to relent and slip him a few thin strands of turkey.
Thanksgiving is tomorrow, which means the rest of the weekend will be devoted to leftovers. I’m particularly partial to turkey sandwiches made of leftover white meat and a think sliver of jellied cranberry sauce, sandwiched between the warm halves of a buttermilk biscuit. But as much as I love these delicacies, I have to remind myself that the rest of the leftovers will be waiting for me as well, destined to be smushed into progressively stranger combination platters as the week wears on.
I wore cuff-links to a job interview once and was so distracted by their clunkiness that I only caught bits and pieces of what the interviewer was saying. Fortunately, I did well enough to land the job, but the incident taught me that cuff-links, no matter how good they look, simply do not agree with me. I’m partial to dress shirts that hug the wrist, not ones that slosh around like billowy robes threatening to unravel in a stiff, starched mess should the fasteners holding them in place happen to fail.