One Big Happy (9/15/10)

I used to be blond. As a young boy, my hair was the color of straw. But even though I was fair-haired, I never caught grief for it. No family member told a blond joke in my presence. No neighbor knocked on my forehead and asked, “Anybody home?” And no friend adopted a valley girl accent when talking to me. My guess is that I was spared ridicule because (a) I was a kid, and (b) I was a boy. To quote Bart Simpson, “Blond guys aren’t dumb. They’re evil. Like in The Karate Kid or World War Two.” Rather than make fun of me, I think the people in my life breathed a sigh of relief when I started school and my hair suddenly became darker.

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